| Pulitzers ad infinitum |
[May. 27th, 2009|01:19 pm] |
Been a long while since I posted one of these. I haven't been moving very fast with the books, anyway, mostly because there have been a number of either weighty tomes or literary duds. Anyway, here's the last batch:
1980: The Executioner's Song by Norman Mailer. This falls into the "tome" category: eight or nine hundred pages on the real-life crimes and trial of Gary Gilmore, who murdered two men for no particular reason and then chose not to contest his sentence of execution. It clearly owes a lot to Capote's In Cold Blood - the similarities between the two books are marked - but Mailer extends the narrative into the media circus surrounding Gilmore. It's long, exhaustively researched, and for the most part, very interesting.
1979: The Stories of John Cheever by (you guessed it) John Cheever. Fuck you, John Cheever. I won't lie to you: I did not finish this book. It exemplifies everything that sucks about the Pulitzers, being composed of smug, self-satisfied, literary jerk-off stories about rich New Yorkers and their servants. The best I can say for it is that Cheever is dead, and therefore no longer writing such shitbombs.
1978: Elbow Room by James Alan McPherson. Shrug. It was okay. Afros and petty gangsters figure prominently, which is a plus.
1976: Humboldt's Gift by Saul Bellow. What's this? A novel about a wealthy New York writer struggling to find meaning in his life? Wow, never seen that before. Funny at times, yes, but horribly, painfully pedantic.
1975: The Killer Angels by Michael Shaara. Finally, a good book! A great book, in fact, such as nearly redeems the others. Shaara's dramatization of the Battle of Gettysburg is a page-turner, with vividly drawn historical characters, tense action sequences, and a heartfelt consideration of the reasons (and lack thereof) this country fought the Civil War.
1973: The Optimist's Daughter by Eudora Welty. An aging Mississippi woman mourns her parents' deaths. I feel completely neutral about this book. Didn't hate it, didn't love it. In fact, it did nothing for me at all. Apparently the New York Times Book Review called it "The best book Eudora Welty has ever written," which makes me wonder if that was really a recommendation.
Still reading? Congratulations. So am I, though after this last bunch I'm starting to wonder if it's worth it. |
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| Dragons like cheesy potatoes too |
[Apr. 29th, 2009|01:03 am] |
Been drawing like mad. Completed the foreground today for the third piece of the triad I'll be hanging on Friday. The drawing is of Kannon atop a dragon, and I'm happy to say that I'm finally at the point in my artistic career where I can draw a kickass full-color dragon freehand. Also, those of you who know Meg will get a kick out of this if and when you see it, because Kannon, by no coincidence, looks exactly like dear Megra.
Also been cooking a lot. Yesterday I made a childhood favorite I haven't had in ages - cheesy potatoes with sliced hot dogs baked in. Used veggie dogs, naturally, frying them beforehand with some onions and garlic to lend the casserole added flavor and texture. Sliced the potatoes thin, boiled them until soft but not disintegrating, and drained them. Made a proper cheese sauce with butter, flour, warmed milk, and probably eight ounces of cheese. Mixed it all together, topped it with a crapload more cheese, and broiled to perfection.
It was, I kid you not, delicious. |
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| New house, drawing, yoga, walking |
[Apr. 14th, 2009|10:23 pm] |
Obviously I haven't been too into journaling lately, but it's been almost a month, so here's a quick update for y'all.
I'm now living with Meg and roomie Kelsey in the top floor of a house in upper Queen Anne, having finished up my lease in the craphole studio in lower Q.A. I adore living with Meg, and the house is certainly nicer than my previous habitation (amazing view of the mountains from the sweep of windows in the kitchen). It is somewhat crowded with three of us here, I admit, but I think the space issues are being resolved and will soon cease to be a problem.
Still working at Pagliacci Pizza. It is what it is. I need to look for a new job, and hate looking for jobs.
Been spending most of my spare time drawing. I finished the Manjusri (the bodhisattva of transcendent wisdom) I had been working on a week or two ago and am well into the next piece, a drawing of Samantabhadra (the bodhisattva of enlightened action), in the same style. It should be finished in the next three or four days, and then I'll begin on the third piece, of Kannon (the bodhisattva of compassion). Unfortunately, my photography skills are far inferior to my drawing skills, and so I can't show you what I'm doing until I get access to a scanner.
All this is in preparation for a little show I'm having at Meg's creperie at the beginning of next month. When she suggested it a few months ago I thought, hey, no problem, I've got tons of time. Now I'm coming up on the deadline and wondering why I didn't ask for another month. Ah, well, it motivates me to work.
Started doing yoga again now that I have the space. Feels good. Body had been getting a little slack.
Spend a good deal of time walking to and from work each day (thirty-five minutes one-way). Intend to buy a bicycle as soon as I get my deposit back, but I enjoy walking in any case. Fantastic views all over Queen Anne. Ocean, mountains, city, blossoming trees everywhere. |
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| The quiz is right, you should move to Seattle |
[Mar. 15th, 2009|10:53 pm] |
Had a terrific day, and I feel a thousand times more relaxed than I did this morning. Friday and Saturday a little stressful at work, short-staffed as we were. Today I slept in, drank lots of coffee, took care of some bills, did the laundry, filed a change-of-address form with the post office in preparation for my move at the end of the month. Went shopping, came home and drew for a little while before Meg came over.
Meg! Fabulous. Happy just to hear her voice on the phone. When she got here we drank beer, talked for a while, then walked over to Bamboo Garden, the incredible Chinese vegetarian restaurant down the street. Green tea, curried "beef" with broccoli and potatoes, a mock-chicken dish in a fried-potato basket called "Hidden Treasure."
Windy out but a beautiful clear evening. Walked up the hill to upper Queen Anne in a pellucid blue air with the sea over our shoulders. |
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| Questions for Dr. Manhattan |
[Mar. 13th, 2009|10:57 am] |
I finally saw Watchmen on Wednesday night, and it was terrific. Ignore the naysayers: The movie's awesome. It not only retains the strengths of the comic, but manages even to improve upon the original.
I say this particularly in regard to the film's ending. Without spoiling it for anyone, I found the climax of the comic disappointing - a dive into comic-book camp in a work that otherwise studiously avoids it. The movie's conclusion, by contrast, is perfectly logical; it's just too bad Alan Moore didn't think of it first.
I want to make it clear, though, that I mean this strictly in terms of writing - it's an elegant plot wrap-up, and I admire the writers for it. Politically, however, I think it's ridiculous. The idea - much used in science fiction - that a common inhuman enemy would end war between nations (and the threat of nuclear destruction) is silly. It's wrong for the same reason that the idea of mutually assured destruction serving as a deterrent is wrong, namely that it vastly underestimates the human capacity for self-destructiveness. Mutually assured destruction is no deterrent for someone who wishes to be destroyed. Furthermore, technology by its nature increasingly concentrates destructive power in the hands of individuals, and already it hardly requires the efforts of a nation to wreak worldwide devastation; you need only a few determined people with sufficient scientific resources. The ultimate solution to the threat of global violence can lie only in the personal and societal renunciation of violence.
Speaking of apocalyptic problems, the world's population is now 6.8 billion people, and is, of course, steadily increasing. Still, incredibly, our leaders almost never mention the word "population," when it lies at the heart of every environmental issue we face. We can drive all the electric cars we want, but when we hit 10 billion people, this planet's gonna be in deep doo-doo.
All right, I'm getting off my soapbox now.
As I was writing this, I received an e-mail from the University of Washington: nope, not accepted. Meh. No real surprise. Been looking into their teaching program. There's an information session about it a week from now that I intend to go to, but it's going to interfere with travel plans - Meg and I were supposed to leave for Denver that morning. Probably we'll end up leaving that night. Meg proposed driving straight through the night, but I honestly hate doing that. I'm thinking maybe we could get out of Seattle at 5 p.m.(leaving at Friday rush hour - genius idea) drive for seven hours, get a hotel, sleep, then drive all day Saturday to make it there that night.
Been drawing a lot. Excited about the piece. It should be done on Sunday, I think.
As a last note on Watchmen, be warned that it's extremely gory - more so than I expected. Also, I found Dr. Manhattan's penis distracting (I know, I know, I mean, who wouldn't, right?). I appreciate that OK, he's naked, so why hide it, he's not neutered, but still, there's this animated blue penis waving around all the time in scenes that are clearly not about his penis. And he can change his body and clothing at will, right? So is he just an exhibitionist, does he simply enjoy waggling his blue penis in people's faces cuz, you know, he's sort of a god, and what are you going to do about it, huh? |
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| Finances, Obama, pizza, plans |
[Mar. 7th, 2009|08:17 pm] |
To start with, this Daily Show confirms what I already suspected: No one understands the financial crisis. It is ultimately inscrutable, resulting as it does from essentially chaotic systems colliding with each other. If you claim to understand it, you aspire to an suprahuman level of comprehension and I, for one, believe you are full of shit.
Also, the guys running these companies are crooks. I say: Lock 'em up, nationalize their companies, and hope for the best. Anything's got to be better than giving these assholes more money.
Aside from this, I think Obama is doing a heckuva job, and David Brooks' fluttery fulminations confirm it. Obama has, in his six weeks in office, reversed the global gag rule on abortion counseling; reinstated government funding for embryonic stem cell research; revived the Endangered Species List; halted DEA raids on medical-marijuana cooperatives in California; and, um, add to the list as you see fit. Admittedly, a lot of these amount to reversing Bush administration policies, but that's great. If all Obama does is turn back the clock eight years, I'll still be absurdly happy.
Moving on from national politics, I made a lot of pizza today. While I know that pizza is not the most interesting topic in the world, I'd nevertheless like to point out that making pizza is more difficult than you think. That damned toss. All in the wrist, or so I'm told. Anyway, I made like, 120 pizzas today.
I was not accepted to the University of Iowa. This is not surprising, and as I've said before, I don't expect to be accepted to the University of Washington, either, because I don't feel my application was actually very good.
This leaves me several options. I could simply wait, write some new short stories, work on the analytical essay, and reapply this year with considerably stronger submissions and in-state tuition should I be accepted.
I like this in many respects. I still want to work as a writer. However, the thought of making pizza for the next year pains me, and so I think I will both reapply to grad school and seek a teaching certificate beginning this fall.
Okay, enough. I got beer to drink. Salud! |
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| Upcoming trip, color pencils, desk |
[Feb. 19th, 2009|11:44 am] |
Currently plan to be in Denver on the evening of Saturday, March 21, flying out Wednesday, March 25. I have to admit that I have certain misgivings about the trip - snowstorms in Colorado are not uncommon in March, and if the forecast is for snow the trip may have to be canceled, especially as Meg's car is hardly in excellent condition. Actually, the whole idea of driving a car 1,300 miles in order to sell it seems ill-considered, but at this point, with the tickets purchased, it's a done deal. Upside is, if everything goes well it'll be a grand time.
Received a set of Prismacolor pencils yesterday that I'd purchased cheap on eBay. A genuinely good deal, and I'm eager to get started on some Buddhist-themed pieces I've been sketching out.
Bought a new desk from Office Max on Monday. Naturally I had no easy way to get it home, so I ended up strapping to a little hand dolly and wheeling it back the eight blocks to my apartment. This was a little bit funny and a little bit strenuous, but now I have a for-reals computer desk and my apartment is slightly less cluttered. It's too bad I'm leaving soon, really, because only now is my studio beginning to look like I'd imagined it. Just need a new, smaller, more attractive couch, along with some odds and ends, but now there's no point. Shrug.
Started learning "Dust in the Wind" by Kansas. More fingerstyle stuff. Very easy to play, actually. It's funny, because the Leonard Cohen songs I've been working on - especially "The Stranger Song" - are more difficult than many other folk classics. |
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| Your morning announcements |
[Feb. 11th, 2009|03:03 pm] |
First up: I'm coming to Denver! ETA: March 22. Here's why: Meg recently took her car in for some repairs and found it would cost her about $1200 to replace her failing brakes. This is hardly worth it for her little VW, and so the plan is to drive it to Denver, where her cousin will perform any necessary repairs and then sell it. Upshot is, it would be good for me to come along to help with the drive, and it's an excuse to see all youze guys reading this. Clear your calendars or face your doom!
Second: Last week Meg and her roommate Kelsey invited me to come live with them when my lease expires at the end of March. As this proposal possesses undeniable financial advantages, I intend to take them up on it. I'll be sad, it's true, to say goodbye to my little apartment, not because it's a great spot - it's not - but because it's been mine, all mine, a luxury I had not enjoyed since I was a teenager. Ah, well. In any case the three of us shall have fantastical times together. With unicorns, possibly.
Third... um, I don't really have a third announcement. I've gotten "Blackbird" pretty much down, and am much better at Leonard Cohen's "Stranger Song." I think "Stairway to Heaven" will be the next to fall. I've been working here and there on some artwork and have purchased some art supplies I lost in the move. Meg is awesome. Seattle is awesome. Work is dumb. Life is generally very good and it's a beautiful, sunny day. |
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| Soundtrack |
[Feb. 9th, 2009|11:26 am] |
More viral silliness.
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For the first question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button TWICE
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool...just type it in man!
7. Tag 10 people, and they have to do it too :)
IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE
1. Opening Credits:
Smashing Pumpkins - Landslide
2. Waking Up:
Arrested Development - Fishin For Religion
3. First Day at School:
Mr. Lif - Murz is My Manager
4. Falling in Love:
Metallica - The Unforgiven
5. Losing Virginity:
Orbital - Theme From Dr. Who
6. Fight Song:
Tortoise - Djed
7. Breaking Up:
The Cox Family - I Am Weary (Let Me Rest)
8. Prom:
Johnny Cash - Danny Boy
9. Life:
Yo La Tengo - Out the Window
10. Mental Breakdown:
Nick Drake - Which Will
11. Driving:
Portishead - To Kill a Dead Man
12. Flashback:
Arrested Development - People Everyday (flashback to the beginning of this list)
13. Getting Back Together:
My Morning Jacket - I Will Sing You Songs
14. Wedding:
The Rolling Stones - Sympathy for the Devil
15. Birth of Child:
Devotchka - Life is Short
16. Final Battle:
Vampire Weekend - One (Blake's Got a New Face)
17. Death Scene:
Syd Barrett - Lanky
18. Funeral Song:
Orbital - Easy Serv (apparently my soundtrack is repetitive)
19. End Credits:
The Verve - The Drugs Don't Work (movie ends up being about drugs after all) |
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| 25 never quite entirely random things |
[Jan. 30th, 2009|12:17 am] |
Cuz everyone else is doing it. I'll try to keep to things you may _not_ know, on the principle that if you wanted general info, you could go to my profile. Still, some duplication is inevitable.
1. When I was fifteen I moved from Mackenzie, B.C., to a high rise on Nuannu Avenue in Honolulu. Almost every night I went downstairs and sat in the hot tub, which, in reflection, must have annoyed my neighbors.
2. I learned to juggle clubs in that same apartment (I already knew how to juggle balls). Later on I realized that if you could juggle clubs, you could juggle knives, and so it was.
3. I married the first girl I ever kissed.
4. I attended five high schools and graduated in Casper, Wyoming.
5. You know, 25 is just too many.
6. When I was twenty I went to over a hundred bachelor parties around Colorado as a bodyguard and driver. Funny because I wasn't yet old enough to buy alcohol.
7. Of course, by that time I'd already done a lot of drugs and was wearing a shirt with "be here now" embroidered on it. I had another shirt that just said "strange".
8. Why do I choose these things?
9. My grandparents on my father's side live in a small town named Pleasanton, just outside San Antonio in Texas. There are two places to go in Pleasanton: Bubba's gas station and the Baptist Church.
10. I was raised Jehovah's Witness. Fortunately I gave it up shortly after puberty.
11. My earliest memories are of my Grandmere's house in Montreal.
12. I have a large mole on my upper back. When I was a kid I once drove a needle through it. I think I wanted to see if I could lance it, or pop it like a zit. It bled. Are you happy you're still reading this?
13. I have two scars, both small: one on my inner right thigh from some barbed wire, and a crescent on my left toe from falling into a root cellar in Pouce Coupe, B.C.
14. Oh, here's one. I sang in a metal band in college for like, a month. Four weeks running. It was terrifically bad but I had fun.
15. I've been poor all my life and don't much expect it to change.
16. I still write poetry. Not much, and not often, but sometimes.
17. I go on kicks. I don't know if this is a strength or a weakness. I'll write poetry for a while, then fiction, then start drawing again, then pick up guitar, or dancing, or yoga, or whatever. Sometimes I think I just like to learn new things, and other times I suspect I'm making excusing for a lack of focus.
18. I second-guess myself. I'm highly analytical and a contingency planner.
19. I'm an expert vegetarian cook. I'm wouldn't call myself an expert in many things, but that's one of em. If it's made of veggies, I can cook it.
20. I've known many genuinely conscious, kind and open people. I'm thankful for them every day. This means you!
21. I frickin love Barack Obama. I don't know if the infatuation will last, but ten days in I still think he's terrific.
22. I love Nick Drake, too. Listening to him now. Something ethereal in his voice.
23. I once hiked with my dad and a friend of his into a valley on the Napali Coast of Kauai called Miloli'i. Slept on the beach there. Stars like you wouldn't believe. Sound of the surf unceasing.
24. I read a lot. Always have.
25. My god, I've been writing this forever. It's like a last will and testament, which I've never written in full but have started more than once.
There. Twenty-five, more or less. Hope you enjoyed them as much as I've enjoyed reading youse alls. |
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| Volunteer Park |
[Jan. 28th, 2009|04:54 pm] |
Continuing our weekly tour of Seattle's parks, Meg and I went to Volunteer Park yesterday.
We had heard good things about the park. It was reputed to host, among other things, a plant conservatory, the Seattle Asian Art Museum, an old water tower, a reservoir, and Bruce Lee's grave. It was a sure winner.
Alas, our pleasure in its grounds was blunted by a frigid wind and several other circumstances. First of all, the museum was closed. What's closed on a Tuesday afternoon? The Seattle Asian Art Museum, apparently.
Second, we were unable to enter the graveyard from the park, and the wind discouraged from spending more time looking for the entrance. So the elaborate kung fu battle I'd planned to have with Bruce Lee's ghost did not come to pass. You've won this round, Lee!
The conservatory, however, was a winner. After strolling a while with the heat slowly dissipating from our bodies, we stepped into a little tropical paradise - free of charge! Free stuff rules. As you passed from one room of the conservatory to the next the climate and plants would change, moving from tropical to subtropical to desert. I liked the desert environment the most - some huge prickly pears towering over you, and lots of needled oddities. |
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| Didn't even have to use my AK |
[Jan. 20th, 2009|11:50 pm] |
Today I woke up next to Meg. This was the start of a perfect day. Ate a leisurely breakfast and did the NY Times crossword together over coffee.
Mid-morning Meg returned to her place for a bit to shower and whatnot. I also showered and then set about moving the last of the clutter from my move out of my apartment and out of my life. When Meg came back we loaded it up and took it to Goodwill.
From there we drove to Washington Park and spent a couple hours walking around the misty, mossy, mysterious grounds. Ducks aplenty, crows, a flicker, some birds like robins but with more triangular beaks. Trees from around the globe, the park hosting an aboretum. Eucalyptus and true ash with small signs before them. A tree in the Winter Garden with yellow blooms in January.
Stopped at Trader Joe's and made supper at Meg's place. Herb salad with goddess dressing, gnocci with faux-meat sauce, spinach and capers. Cheap but palatable red wine. Macadamia-and-white-chocolate cookies for dessert.
Over our salads we watched Obama's inaugural speech online. It was great. I love him. I love him in precise inverse proportion to how much I disliked Bush. That he is now president and Bush is not makes me profoundly satisfied.
Also: I have a new axe! It's a solid-top Yamaha acoustic (FG-402, if anyone's curious), and I got it with stand, gig bag and capo from a guy off Craigslist. Drove to his apartment in Belltown after dinner, played the guitar for a couple minutes, and handed him the cash.
This is awesome. This is so awesome. Can't tell you how much I've missed having a guitar.
Returned to Meg's and played a game of Scrabble while Charlotte the cat lounged in the guitar case. Walked home with the lamps of 8th Avenue disappearing into a thick fog.
Gotta say, it was a good day. |
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| Peace out |
[Jan. 16th, 2009|01:38 pm] |
I'm sorry to say it, kids, but I think I'm taking my leave of LiveJournal. It's been a good run, but the fact is nearly all of my friends on here are on Facebook anyway, and Facebook offers a lot more services than LJ, as does Blogger.
If you haven't already friended me on Facebook, you can find me under my name, Joel Tagert.
Adios, amigos. |
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| Merry Antichristmas |
[Dec. 25th, 2008|10:20 am] |
Ah, Christmas. My least favorite holiday. Call me a Grinch (who was always a more interesting character than Santa anyway). I suspect the reason I don't care for Christmas - other than its revolting mercantilism and pretensions of Christian piety - is that I don't possess the reservoir of nostalgia for it most people build up during their childhoods, never having celebrated it in our Jehovah's Witness household. So blame it on the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society, why dontcha.
Also, it seems like on Christmas I'm always a) staying with the in-laws and being forced to make polite conversation, or b) wandering in depressing solitude through a city that's had all life drained out of it by the vampire touch of Saint Nick.
Regarding that last, I'd like to point out that Satan and Santa are the same person. Consider:
1) The similarity of the names! Switch the last two letters, and there you go. If this were a Harry Potter novel, it'd be a dead giveaway.
2) They're both big and red.
3) They both preside over cruel underworlds. (The elves are in hell.)
4) Santa is known as Saint Nick. Satan is known as Old Nick. Coincidence? I think not.
5) They both have evil laughs. ("'Ho ho ho!' the Devil boomed as he cast another screaming soul into the lake of fire.")
Happy... hellidays! (Cackles like the Crypt Keeper.) |
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| Starbucks, Portland, all downhill from here |
[Dec. 17th, 2008|05:55 pm] |
As I mentioned, I recently started working for Starbucks... or should I say, Starsucks. Oh, man, I kills myself. Or want to.
Erm, it does suck bad, though, and after two weeks there, I'm on the verge of quitting. I'm working full-time at Pagliacci Pizza now anyway, so while I can't say I don't need the money, it's not as essential as it was a month ago. I can pay my rent without it. And Starbucks sucks bad. It reminds me in a truly awful way of working at Taco Bell and Arby's back when I was eighteen and nineteen, which highlights the utter lack of progress I've made careerwise.
So fuck it. Come January I'll resume the ol' job search in any case, looking for something that will pay me actual money. Wish me luck.
On a more positive note, Meg and I went to Portland on Monday to visit her friend Morgan. We walked downtown in the bitter cold and drank Spanish coffee at an Irish pub. Then we got take-out from a terrific Thai place called Thai Orchid and went back to Morgan's apartment. The initial plan had been to go to the zoo to see the Christmas lights, but the zoo, it turns out, was closed due to weather.
Instead, we got high and tried to play a board game called the Game of Real Life, which is only a little like the Game of Life. It was the first time I'd been high in over a year, and honestly, I was having a lot of trouble following the rules. After a while I gave up and lay down on the couch, being entirely satisfied with watching everyone else play. I kind of want to purchase the game now, though. It's funny. You remember how in the Game of Life you ended up married with two kids and then the game just ended? Well, in the Game of Real Life, you die at the end. There's also a Nuclear War square. If anyone lands on it, everyone dies, and the game is over. Ha!
A couple more people came over and we played Catchphrase. Then Meg and Morgan jointly decided that this small gathering should become a dance party, and so I danced with them for a little while before finally returning to my ever-so-welcoming couch. (I'd worked a lot the week before, and gotten up early that morning. Also, as I mentioned, I was really high.) Good times.
We left the next morning, with a little excitement on the way. You see, Morgan's apartment is at the top of a steep hill, which naturally had frozen to a solid sheet of ice the previous night. Meg's car was parked at the top of this hill, and because of the ice there was no way to go back up the hill. The only way out was down.
"Okay," I said. "Just pump the brake, keep it slow. We're just going to go to the bottom of this hill. I'll stay out here and push you if I need to."
About halfway down, I realized that this was an inherently flawed idea. "Pump the brake!" I yelled as I half-ran, half-slid down the hill beside the careening car, now completely out of control.
"I am pumping the brake!" Meg screamed back. It's true, she was.
The car hit a VW Bug and stopped. The bug was not much damaged - a broken taillight, a streak of red paint from Meg's car. C'est la vie. I blame the bug. Little bubbly thing was just begging to be hit. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 3rd, 2008|10:51 pm] |
"To learn to be always in a state of meditation means never to let your vital energy wane. You would never allow it to do so if it were certain that you were to die tomorrow. It wanes because you forget about death. Grit your teeth, fix your gaze, and observe death at this moment. You have to feel it so strongly that is seems as if it’s attacking you. Fearless energy comes from this. At this moment death is right before your eyes. It’s not something you can afford to neglect."
- Suzuki Shosan (1579-1655)
Courtesy of ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) daily_zen. |
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| 100 things... |
[Dec. 2nd, 2008|07:11 pm] |
Stolen from Cory. Stuff I've done is in bold.
100 Things
1. Started your own blog - Obviously.
2. Slept under the stars - Any number of times. Most memorably at Miloli'i State Park on the Napali Coast of Kauai.
3. Played in a band - Well, sort of sang in a band a couple times.
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland - Not so long as I can avoid it
8. Climbed a mountain - Though it depends on what you mean by "climb." "Hiked" is what I've done.
9. Held a praying mantis - Seen em, never held one.
10. Sung a solo - like, a capella? I'll say yes.
12. Visited Paris - someday I'd like to
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea - no, but it sounds neat
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked - in Costa Rica once or twice
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort - every winter, growing up
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset - If you haven't, you're either comatose or in prison
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors - Sure. Pleasanton, Texas.
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language - Couldn't say I've taught myself...
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke - Does Rock Band count?
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant - not sure. probably.
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkelling - snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theatre
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching - used to watch em all the time from the beach
63. Got flowers for no reason - erm, I've _bought_ them for no reason, but not received them
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check - just yesterday
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favourite childhood toy - nah, I'm not nostalgic about things
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job - Heh. Mini Mart.
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone - Left arm when I was a kid. Trying to get down from the roof via a tree that ended up being too slim for it.
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book - alas, no
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car - you should never buy new cars. terrible waste of money.
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper - as a columnist at The Metropolitan. Probably also for other things. Been on TV for some political stuff, too.
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox and didn't know it at the time
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous - Dennis Kucinich is famous, I guess.
92. Joined a book club - heh, funny, but no
93. Lost a loved one - funny phrasing. grandparents, though to be honest I wasn't that close to them. But I still loved em, so hey.
94. Had a baby - hmmm, delicious!
95. Seen the Alamo in person - with my dad. A lot of Japanese tourists.
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake - didn't look that appealing, actually
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone - when was this written, 1985?
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day - many times |
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| Bedtime |
[Dec. 1st, 2008|10:41 pm] |
Yesterday I went and got a futon mattress for my (platform) bed. It's not quite the right size - it's a full rather than a queen - but it was completely free, I having found it on Craigslist. Incidentally, Craigslist rules. Lately I've taken to using "Queen Anne" as my search terms - that being my neighborhood - and looking only at what's available right here. Somehow it seems different to buy something from someone who lives only a few blocks away.
It's funny what a difference having a mattress makes. I realize now that I've felt like a transient this last month sleeping on blankets and my yoga mat atop bare boards. Like at any moment I might decide, you know, screw it, I'm outta here. Now I have a proper place to sleep, and it's homier. I'm like an animal making a den. Not secure until I have a bed of grass to lie on.
No doubt I'll feel even better once I get a couch. My kingdom for a place to sit. |
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| A horn the color of the moon |
[Dec. 1st, 2008|10:15 pm] |
Just finished rewatching No Country For Old Men. In the final monologue, as it was in McCarthy's book, the sheriff is talking about a dream of his father:
"The second one, it was like we was both back in older times and I was on horseback goin' through the mountains of a night. Goin' through this pass in the mountains. It was cold and there was snow on the ground and he rode past me and kept on goin'. Never said nothin' goin' by. He just rode on past... and he had his blanket wrapped around him and his head down and when he rode past I seen he was carryin' fire in a horn the way people used to do and I could see the horn from the light inside of it. 'Bout the color of the moon. And in the dream I knew that he was goin' on ahead and he was fixin' to make a fire somewhere out there in all that dark and all that cold, and I knew that whenever I got there he would be there."
It reminded me of a quote by Robert Frost that I read here on Livejournal. A reporter asked Frost, "Do you have hope for the future?"
"Yes," Frost replied. "And also for the past, that it will turn out to have been all right for what it was."
There is, in both statements, such a profound faith in the ultimate beneficence of things past, present, and future, that you have to feel both men understood something essential. "That it will turn out to have been all right for what it was." |
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